Power

Marital Power

“The issues of power, control, and hierarchy are important in families. Issues regarding power are at the root of many family problems” (Miller, 2008, p.1).

I agree wholeheartedly with this statement from the article, “Who is the Boss? Power Relationships in Families,” by Richard B. Miller. Issues regarding power are important in families and are often the source of many family problems. Why is that?

I think that in life, power is something that is often sought for. We seek to have power over our own lives, over situations, over the things we cannot control. In families, the source of several disagreements or struggles often has power struggles as the underlying cause.

In his article, Miller, address four important aspects regarding power in families:

1.    Parents are the leaders in the family

In response to the first one, parents are the leaders in the family; I think that this is a very important one. Parents are the leaders in a family relationship. Children should not be allowed to control, demean or replace the position of leadership that their parents have the right to have and maintain, in a healthy family circumstance.

2.    Parents must be untied in their leadership

In response to the first one, parents are the leaders in the family; I think that this is a very important one. Parents are the leaders in a family relationship. Children should not be allowed to control, demean or replace the position of leadership that their parents have the right to have and maintain, in a healthy family circumstance.

3.    The parent-child hierarchy dissolves when children become adults

For the third one, the parent-child hierarchy dissolves when children become     adults, Miller warns of the dangers that could happen if parents hold on to their children past the age of adulthood. In Ephesians 5:31 it says: “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.”

4.    The marital relationship should be a partnership

The marital relationship should really be a partnership. I heard it once that a husband can be compared to one hand and the wife compared to the other. Separately they can accomplish tasks, but together they are much stronger and untied in purpose.

When we are more focused on loving on another and fulfilling our roles in life, we will be more willing to put off the natural man and no longer engage in power-struggles.